By forgetting about discipline in the conventional sense.
“Being” disciplined doesn’t work.
Every
major study that has ever been conducted has shown pretty definitively
that our conventional idea of discipline aka willpower doesn’t work the
way that people believe it does.
You can’t just FORCE yourself to make massive changes overnight.
Your brain isn’t set up that way.
Are
there outliers who seem to be able to bend their actions to their
higher self’s will? Of course! Jocko Willink, David Goggins, and Gary
Vee are all great examples.
But you’re not one of them.
And if you were then you wouldn’t be reading this response.
For
us mere mortals who aren’t gifted with an insatiable drive to DO, we
need to take a slightly different approach to discipline.
Namely, we need to forget about it and instead, focus on creating systems that support our goals.
Here’s what I mean…
1. To Be Disciplined, Limit the Number of Things Which Require Discipline
It’s
pretty common knowledge that you can only change a handful of habits at
a time (with the exception of individuals who leverage relocation to
alter their patterns).
So the first order of
business - for those of you looking to be more disciplined - is to
limit the number of things which require discipline.
For example…
Don’t
attempt to wake up early, start going to the gym, quit caffeine, work
longer hours, and learn a new instrument all at the same time.
Instead, pick the habit that will have the BIGGEST impact on your overall life and well being.
You
might decide to wake up earlier because it will make it more likely
that you will go to the gym, work longer, and make time to play an
instrument.
But don’t focus on other things.
Simply start waking up earlier until it becomes a habit that no longer requires motivation… And then move on to the next habit.
The more automatic your behaviors become, the less you require discipline to do them.
If you can change one new habit every month, this means that in 12 months you can successfully…
- Start waking up at 5 a.m.
- Start going to the gym (or at least being physically active) every day
- Quit sugar
- Quit caffeine
- Adhere to the paleo diet
- Meditate for 20 minutes a day
- Journal for 15 minutes a morning
- Read for 60 minutes a day
- Stop watching TV
- Eliminate porn
- Practice a muscial instrument or other skill based activity
- Quit your biggest bad behavior
However, if you try and change all of this at once, you’ll end up changing nothing and ultimately failing to make real progress.
I know it’s not sexy or particularly motivating, but if you want to do more, start by doing LESS.
2. Make it Easy
Humans are naturally lazy creatures.
We had to be.
10,000
years ago, laziness was a virtue. The person who could accomplish the
most with the least amount of work conserved the most energy and stood
the strongest chance of surviging.
Today, it’s no different.
The less energy you have to expend to accomplish a goal, the more successful you will be.
If you want to be disciplined, then make it easy to be discipline by altering your environment to serve your goals.
If
you want to lose weight… Throw out all of your sugary foods, order your
groceries from Instacart (so you can’t throw snacks and crap into the
buggy) and meal prep healthy foods to make it easy to stick to a diet.
If
you want to exercise more, get a membership at a gym that is close to
your work or buy an Iron Gym pull up bar and some kettlebells so that
you can easily exercise throughout the day.
If
you want to be less distracted at work, install a Facebook newsfeed
blocker and use other website blocking apps to keep you focused.
Make it incredibly easy to stick to your new habits and behaviors and you’ll be more likely to see them through until the end.
3. Get an Accountability Partner
When you have someone holding you to your goals, it’s much easier to actually accomplish them.
It’s much harder to give into your emotional desires when you are accountable to someone you deeply do not want to disappoint.
Find someone in your social circle who will respect and encourage your goals and ask them to hold you accountable.
Meet with them once a week (in person or over the phone) to share your progress.
If you don’t hit your goals, donate a painful amount of money to a charity that you despise.
I promise, this will dramatically reduce your need for discipline and improve the likelihood that you will achieve your goals.
Hope this helps.